| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Iraqi Pigs |
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Gregory Morris, 4/14/10 1:20:53 pm |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
So here's an ironic story that, if it weren't so sad, would be downright hysterical.
Parts of Iraq rely on farming not only for food, but as a significant part of their economy. Actually, come to think of it, Iraq is probably where farming was invented... but that's another topic altogether. Right now there is a new and growing problem with feral pigs absolutely obliterating the crops. As you know, Muslims consider pigs to be unclean, which leaves more bacon for me. Er... I mean, they won't touch them. This is a problem. Sure, they can kill them, but then they have a dead, bloody pig, which has three-times the unclean cooties of a live one.
At this point, my intrepid reader is probably asking why this is a new problem. Well, before I give you the answer, I'm afraid I must first torment you with a little bit of a history lesson.
Consider this: for the last 1500 some odd years (give or take a few hundred years), there has been a significant Christian presence in Iraq. There were churches here before Muhammad's great-great-grandma was born. The oldest known Christian monastery in Iraq dates back to at least the 6th century. Many, many years ago, Mosul was actually the seat of the Syrian Orthodox Patriarch. This is, of course, before the British came in and screwed everything up... but again, that's another story. Regardless, in days gone by, Iraq's Muslims, Christians, and yes Jews actually had a somewhat "peaceful" coexistence. They may not have invited each other to neighborhood barbecues, but at least, they tolerated each others presence.
Fast forward to modern times... By this point, Iraqi Christians have been persecuted for many years by Muslim rulers. However, even under that evil bastard Saddam Hussein, they were allowed to continue worshiping so long as they did it quietly. Ironically, without Hussein's iron-fisted (yet mostly secular) tyranny, the Christian population in Iraq has come under even more violent attacks from various upstart Muslim extremist groups. Tens of thousands of Iraqi Christians have been forced to flee to Syria, Turkey, and elsewhere.
Back to the point at hand. Pigs. Christians don't worry so much about the unclean oink-cooties. Good Christians hunt wild pigs, then eat the hell out of that pork. Roasted, grilled, smoked or fried. So now that the large Christian populations have been driven from Iraq, the only natural enemy of these delicious little crop-devouring critters are gone.
I, for one, would like to see our military leadership offer a solution to these poor and impoverished farmers. My suggestion would be to hand me and some of the other good ol' boys here a rifle, some night-vision optics, and some charcoal. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| | [Comments are closed after a month.] |
|
|
|
|
|
|
| < "On Cat Blogging" | | "There Are FISH!" > |
|
|
|
|
